Evil Plot Thwarted by Super Flu

Portland, OR- Beware evil doers, there’s a new hero in town. A plot to hold the world hostage was forced to an abrupt end by the super flu.

Infamous Super villain, Niles Nefarious fell ill last week during the final stages of his evil plan to hold the entire world for ransom. Nefarious was hospitalized with a high fever, chills and flu-like symptoms.

Doctors report that this particular strain of flu is resistant to treatment and highly contagious, prompting authorities to call it a “super flu”. The CDC has issued a public statement encouraging villains, thugs and evil geniuses to get vaccinated.

“It (the flu) seems to be targeting those who pray on the weak and innocent,” suggested a representative from the Centers for Disease Control. “We think that this strain was born out of some childhood tragedy which must be avenged.”

As an illustration of his brilliance, Nefarious explained his plot to the ambulance driver as they drove toward the hospital. He noted resentfully that it would have worked too, if it weren’t for that meddling flu.

World leaders and concerned civilians have responded with a resounding, “thank you, super flu”.