Area Man Thinks He Can Take “That Big Dude At The Bar”

Brockway, IL – Martin Jones, an average sized 24-year-old file clerk, made a bold statement Friday evening. Allegedly, Jones went out drinking with a few friends, a weekly occurrence.




“I can take that dude,” stated Jones. “He might be able to take me out with one hit, but it won’t get that far.”



Mark Tunney, a long-time friend, tried to calm Jones.



“He always wants to fight when he gets drunk,” stated Tunney. “And he always picks the biggest guy in the bar. He’s gonna get himself killed.”



Despite being at the bar with several friends, Jones reportedly whispered to his glass of whiskey that it was his only friend before attempting to start the altercation. Sources say that Jones then addressed the “big dude” directly.



Jones was subdued by his companions before getting up from his seat. Reportedly, a fresh glass of whiskey was enough to distract Jones from fighting.