Thursday, January 22, 2009

Email Inbox Eagerly Refreshed

Gallup, New Mexico – It began early yesterday morning. Joel Arment, a local office manager, booted up his work computer. It wasn’t long before he signed in and opened his email account. What he would see next was disappointing.

 “Okay, I sent out two emails right before I left work yesterday,” he said. “I don’t understand why I didn’t get a reply yet.”

 Reportedly, Arment sent two emails marked “Urgent” at 8:45 pm, shortly before he left work. As of 6:30 am yesterday morning he had received no reply. The first of the two messages was in regards to a Craigslist posting offering two used couch cushions for twenty dollars or best offer. The second was a humorous email greeting card, which he sent to a friend from college.

 “I offered fifteen dollars for those cushions,” noted Arment. “I think that was a good price for those. The seller couldn’t be serious about wanting twenty.”

 Allegedly, Arment spent nearly half an hour staring at his monitor, occasionally refreshing his inbox.

 “That card I sent to Bill, it was a riot,” mused the frustrated correspondent. “It had this big eyed cat and it said, ‘Cut down on the caffeine’. (Laughing) I guess he’s just laughing so hard; he hasn’t had time to get back to me. Or maybe he can’t find anything that funny to send back. He always said I was lame, that would really piss him off if he couldn't top my e-card.”

 Arment claims to have felt the same wide-eyed excitement every single time he clicked the refresh button.

 “Just knowing that I could get something hilarious from Bill, or an email saying that fifteen was the best offer keeps my heart pounding. It’s like, ‘this click could be the one’, you know?”

 Arment’s team explained that he spends a lot of time checking his email. Though they suspect he rarely receives any. 


Scott said...

Monkey Breath,
I enjoy your blog a lot. It makes me laugh and shoot milk out of my nose, which in turn makes multiple people vomit everywhere and then I vomit. Who woulda thunk it? Anyway, I would like to link to your blog on my page. Let me know if you are interested in a link exchange...