Friday, May 2, 2008

Hybrid Car Inherits Recessive “Gas- Guzzling” Trait

Detroit, MI- General Motors has received criticism during this last week regarding an anomaly produced at one of their new hybrid vehicle factories. The vehicle in question was supposed to be one of GM’s new hybrid models but reportedly prominently displayed the “gas-guzzling” trait which was common in GM’s earlier vehicles.

“It’s bound to happen when you start messing with automotive DNA,” stated Albert Donovan, one of the designers who worked on the vehicle. “Gregor Mendel showed us the probability of a given subject showing any particular trait; it’s the risk we run when we start to domesticate these vehicles by making hybrids.”

Opponents of GM’s hybridization practices have called this vehicle an “abomination” claiming that it is in fact, “the will of god” and a punishment for taking liberties with the vehicle’s natural design. There have been calls from opponents to euthanize the vehicle; suggesting that it is inhumane to allow it to live in such a condition.

Other members of the press and public criticize suggestions to “destroy” the car, noting that the vehicle had no choice in its creation.

“This sort of thing shouldn’t be happening anymore,” continued Donovan. “We thought we had bred them enough generations away from the old Hummers, but I guess we were wrong. Now this little guy has to pay; he doesn’t even know where he’s at.”

General Motors, eager to get this issue behind them has promised to give the car to a nice family who “lives out in the country”.