Monday, July 21, 2008

Fans: Michael Caine’s Face Not Big Enough

Chicago, IL – This weekend, Chicago’s Navy Pier Imax Theater hosted a 72 hour event to celebrate the opening of this year’s highly anticipated film, The Dark Knight. The overwhelming opinion from fans is that the film met, or exceeded, expectations.

Unfortunately, not all fans were so pleased with the movie. The most common complaint was a concern with the size of Oscar-winner Michael Caine’s face.

“I saw it at the Imax,” stated Don Ehrenhaft, a local nerd. “And Michael Caine’s face was only, like, five stories tall! That’s it, five stories. I could barely see his weird eye thing.”

Fans referred to actor Michael Caine who played Alfred, Bruce Wayne (Batman)’s butler. This was a reprisal of the same role from 2005’s Batman begins.

“I’m a big fan of Batman,” continued Ehrenhaft. “It’s really disappointing that the filmmakers would let fans down by under-emphasizing Caine’s face. I think all of the fans would agree that we expected that to be the highlight of the film.”

Director, Christopher Nolan, made a risky move by filming several sequences in the Imax format, perceived by many as a gimmick. Reportedly, fans assumed the Imax scenes would be reserved for close-ups of the Oscar-winner’s recognizable face.

Allegedly, fans are demanding that future efforts be made to enlarge Caine’s visage.

“I won’t rest,” demanded one unhappy fan. “Until I feel like I’m about to be inhaled by Michael Caine.”

Fans were seen outside the theater, seemingly protesting. Many carried signs proclaiming displeasure over the not-larger-than-life-enough portrayal of Caine.

One such sign read; “Goodnight you princes of Imax, you kings of my giant face.”