Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Tether Ball Receives Prestigious “Lamest F-ing Game Ever” Award

Lewistown, MT- “It’s like a ball on a string, right?” questioned Billy Davis, a seventh grader at Benjamin Franklin Middle school in Lewistown. “What do you do with a ball on a string?” Billy, along with his classmates, was in attendance at an award ceremony at which Tether ball received the school’s most prestigious award, “Lamest F-ing Game Ever”.

This year tether ball took the distinction from badminton, last year's champion; which had succeeded the previous winner, “That pole with the funnel thing on top where you throw a ball and it just comes out in a random direction.”

Joseph Prescott, Franklin Middle school’s principal began the annual “Student’s Choice” awards ceremony three years ago. The program was originally intended as a way to allow students to recognize each other for exemplary performance and as an engaging means to acquire student feedback about the school.

“The (Student’s Choice) Awards are kind of a big deal for the kids. They make up the categories, organize the nominations and decide the winners by popular vote,” explained the principal. “The biggest drawback is that the students get to vote, and let’s face it, they’re little monsters. I totally understand the tether ball thing though. It’s like a ball on a string, right? What do you do with a ball on a string?”

Other categories this year included; Latest Bloomer, which was taken home by a homely and sobbing Jenny Parker, Smelliest Kid, won by Tom McGill, and Biggest Tool, awarded to Principal Prescott.

Students are encouraged to submit their anonymous ballots via a cardboard box in the hallway. One such ballot, in reference to tether ball read, “How do you even get points? Are you supposed to hit each other? Or, like, take it off the string? Oh yeah, Prescott is a tool.”