Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Shamu To Receive Treatment for Eating Disorder

San Diego, CA – One of Sea world’s famous orcas (many share the Shamu stage name) was admitted yesterday to a clinic for compulsive overeating. The orca’s trainer, Kimberly Pearson has agreed to accompany the killer whale.

“Her real name is Molly,” said Pearson. “And Molly has a problem. She just can’t stop eating or gaining weight. Through her primitive whale means, she can communicate with me. I understand her pain when she tells me things like ‘I’m hungry’ and ‘I want more [food].”

Reportedly, Pearson and Molly have made several attempts to control the problem themselves, to no avail.

“She’s tried the all-fish diet,” stated Pearson. “But that didn’t work. We tried the Phelps plan; where you swim all day. It’s supposed to be a good work out, but she’s just not losing weight.”

Pearson expressed a heart wrenching concern for her companion. Molly the orca weighs a shocking 9500 lbs.

“The other day I asked her how she felt about her weight,” recalled Pearson. “She just said, ‘I’m a whale’. I tried to tell her that it wasn’t true; she’s not as big as she thinks. She wouldn’t listen. I tried to tell her how beautiful she is, we just need to keep working on it.”