Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Christian Physicists Determine Equation for God

(Love∞)/Wrath≤ God

Warrenville, IL- Physicists at the world famous Fermilab have defined the indefinable after decades of labor. God, as understood by the whole of Christianity, the beginning and end of all existence, is now quantifiable for use in theoretical experiments.

Neil Gorman, head of the team that made the discovery, made an excited statement about his findings.

“We have always started the ‘theo-quation’ with some pretty solid factors in place. The traditional, unsolved, equation contained imagination and magic as constants. We just threw that whole idea out the window. Bill, one of the guys on the team, came in to work one day and he said, ‘Hey, I read last night that God is love’. We started from this God equals Love angle, and just worked it out.”

This is considered by many to be the greatest achievement in science. However, like any other new theory, it has opponents on both sides. Faithless members of the scientific community consider the idea to be a waste of research and an insult to what they call legitimate science.

Inversely, religious members of the non-scientific community claim that it is an affront to faith itself; as God is indefinable.

The equation is regarded as a long needed stepping stone in the scientific disciplines of quantum metaphysics, sub-atomic theology and fuzzy divine logic.