Saturday, April 12, 2008

Lowered Desk Chair Last Straw

Ft. Collins, CO- A small office became the scene of an angry outburst on Monday. Wade Parcel, an IT specialist at Dubois Marketing, was the source of the temper tantrum. Reports claim that Parcel had taken a sick day the previous Friday and just “blew up” upon returning to work Monday morning.

“No, no, I didn’t just freak out without a reason,” spouted an enraged Parcel. “My chair was lowered and it’s really hard to get it how I like it. People are always sitting at my desk when I’m not around; it really pisses me off! My paperclips are always gone, my desktop icons are moved all over the place; one time they were arranged in a heart shape.”

Parcel’s co-workers paint an entirely different picture, claiming that he just “wants a reason to flip out”.

Mark Davis, who sits next to Parcel, disregards the outburst.

“Nobody was sitting at his desk,” stated Davis. “I was here most of the day and I didn’t see anyone there. He just gets all agitated in the morning. This is the first time I’ve seen Wade get all crazy and start yelling though.”

“First it was the post-it note thing,” continued Parcel. “Then it was my phone, then somebody took my lunch right out of the fridge while I was in the bathroom, now this chair thing. I just couldn’t take it anymore.”

The hissy fit was ignored by everyone in the office. It consisted of a lot of yelling and Parcel running around the office lowering unoccupied chairs. Shortly afterward, when Parcel took an angry bathroom break, the office manager admitted to having lowered the chair. He claimed that it was just fun to mess with Parcel.